Theresa May can still save her premiership, just not alone.

Theresa May has, almost single-handedly, destroyed her own premiership. And that is no easy feat considering that the polls had Labour around 20 points behind her when she announced her vanity election.  The only good that could possibly come from a result such as we had would be the humbling of a Prime Minister that thought she was above the scrutiny. It is the only way that she can prevent herself from being remembered as the PM that had it all and gave it all away.


In order to show her new-found humility, there are some views which she must change. At this point, it will not look like the U-turn of a weak PM, but instead the pragmatic choice of a leader looking to serve a nation. If this election has told us anything, it is that there is no appetite for the “hard Brexit” of which many speak. The idea that no deal is better than a bad deal is simply ridiculous as without a deal the people of the UK would suffer in numerous ways.


So, how would she be best going about these negotiations? First of all, she has to understand that she does not just represent those that voted for her party and for Brexit but the rest of the electorate as well. She needs to start a dialogue between all the devolved nations and their respective governing parties. She also has to include Labour in the negotiations to ensure that she is taking all opinions into account. She should ask for a delay in the beginning of negotiations in order to find some on what way the negotiations should go. If not she runs the risk of alienating a substantial portion of the population.


The problem with this though is that she cannot be seen to be favouring the priorities of her vote share. Because of this, she would have to appoint someone outside of the Conservatives to oversee the negotiations, ensuring that everyone’s values are being respected. This would require someone of absolute morals, that understands Europe and the implications of any deal that would be made. The newly re-elected Vince Cable would fit that bill perfectly. What a perfect opportunity for one of the giants of our democracy to firmly cement his name in the history books. It would more than make-up for David Cameron looking past him during the coalition of 2010. He has the experience, with a PhD in economic integration, a subject that will surely be tackled during the negotiations.


Even if the Tories don’t go for this option, they must find the pragmatism that they so often herald as their superiority to reach out beyond party divides, to work together for the betterment of this nation. If they do not, then the consequences could be disastrous, not only for the Conservatives and Theresa May but the entire country.


The Aftermath

It has been a few days now and the dust is beginning to settle on a new political landscape. The election did not go to plan, for anyone. The conservatives had substantial losses, as did the SNP. Labour made gains and UKIP was, in essence, wiped up. So let us have a look and see how this all happened.



While Labour didn’t win on Thursday it seemed like a victory for them. Increasing their number of seats and share of the vote, as well as taking away the Tories majority, is no mean feat for a party that last year was looking like it could split in two.


There are a few reasons that Labour did so much better than everyone was expecting. First, they tapped into the youth vote. After last years Brexit Referendum young people felt that they hadn’t been heard. For many, it was the first time that they could feel the effect of a vote and it went against what many of them would have wanted. This galvanised them for this election. They weren’t going to let an older generation dictate to them for the next five years. Hopefully, they maintain this newfound political interest as it is highly probable that we’ll have another election in the not too distant future. If they do then we can expect to see more parties looking to appeal to the young.


It wasn’t just the youth vote that ensured that the election went well for Labour. Before the election, it was widely thought that the UKIP vote would collapse and go to the Conservatives. While the UKIP vote did collapse, the redistribution did not go the way that most expected. It was split roughly 50-50 between Labour and the Tories. This meant that the Tories didn’t get the automatic boost that they would have expected, but instead, both sides got a roughly equal boost in vote share. This helped to make the youth vote even more influential to the outcome of the result.


The final piece of the puzzle for Labour was their leader, Jeremy Corbyn. In his short time as leader, he has become a seasoned campaigner, having now fought three election campaigns (two for his party leadership and this general election). He was also part of the Remain campaign last year, even if his heart wasn’t in it. So the question is, why has he been more successful? Personally, I think it’s a mixture of a few things. First of all, he is a very personable individual. People like him and he seems to like spending time with real people. He listens to them and has tried to show the public that there might just be a better way forward. Perhaps there really is an appetite for socialism in the UK. Secondly, I think his campaign was planned fantastically. He used the power of social media in a way that showed the best of Britain, unlike the Tories who predominantly used it for attack ads. Looking at Corbyns Snapchat you could see him talking to common folk on the street, addressing crowds of thousands (which is why I think he only went to mainly safe Labour seats) and celebrity endorsements throughout. He has tapped into a new way of reaching out to the public, which I think will soon become the norm.


Finally, it was the manifesto and the way in which it was released. It was a manifesto that looked to bring hope back to working people and the young. But as well as that leaking it (I do not doubt that it was intentional) allowed them to see how the public would respond whilst not answering questions about how it would be implemented. This was a powerful tool, as they could then cherry pick the bits that work to make the strongest manifesto possible.



As well as Labour did the Tories had a terrible night and a worse campaign. Having a head start of at least 20 points in most polls it seemed like they would go on to crush Labour and those other pesky saboteurs. So what ended up going so wrong for the Tories?


Well, the problem really started when the released their manifesto. It seemed like they had given no consideration to their traditional supporters; the older generation. Why they thought it was a good idea to start means-testing the winter fuel allowance or announce the “dementia tax” will remain one of the biggest political mysteries of modern times. It’s not even like they decided to switch base and try and attract young voters. As I write this I can’t actually think of any policy that would be of benefit or interest to anyone under the age of at least 30, if not more. If there is one thing you don’t do in politics it is disgruntle your base support.


But there was more to Theresa Mays humbling than just a poor manifesto. It was the tone of the campaign itself that caused such a disastrous result. The electorate has had enough of slogans and attack ads. “Strong and Stable” means nothing and the Tories insulted the public by trying to tell them that it did. “The magic money tree” was another such failure. But it wasn’t just the way in which the campaign was executed that was flawed but the presidential style in which it was carried out that flopped. Mrs May, unlike Mr Corybn, just didn’t connect with the public in the correct way. The robotic manner in which she uttered words but said nothing of substance did nothing to endear her to the nation. Perhaps she would have been better staying in Downing Street showing strength and stability by running the country, rather than going out into the trenches and failing to connect.


Overall state of play

At the end of the day, not an awful lot seems to have changed. Labour have not quite claimed it as a win but framed it as though they haven’t lost. Which to an extent is true. What is more complicated is what the Tories will now do. They have entered into a “supply and confidence” deal with the DUP, which is likely to throw up a number of problems in the short and long term. Short term, they actually don’t agree on all that much. The DUP fundamentally disagree with a number of the social policies of the Conservative manifesto. And the Conservatives will have a tricky time reconciling the DUP’s homophobic view with Ruth Davidson, who is likely to play a key role in maintaining a Tory government due to the fact that if the Scottish Tory MP’s rebel then the majority is gone. Because of this Scotland’s voice in the upcoming Brexit negotiations is likely to be stronger, if the Scottish contingent stands up for the overwhelming number of Scots that voted to remain.


In the longer term, Northern Ireland might become a major problem. The Good Friday Agreement is based around the British government playing a neutral role in the governing of Northern Ireland. With Tories going into, even an informal, coalition with the DUP, Irish Republicans are likely going to be incensed. Topping it all off is the current negotiations trying to resolve the issues regarding power-sharing at Stormont. While it would take another issue to push it over the top, it does seem like the Troubles aren’t all that distant.


With the Brexit negotiations looming in the background, I believe it is time for British politics to grow up and mature. The days in which we can afford the partisan divide are dwindling. In order to ensure that Brexit is, at the very least, not a disaster, Theresa May has to put aside her pride. Conservatives claim to be pragmatic in their politics, so it is time to put it to the test. They should reach out across party lines and form a consensus as to what Brexit will be. Not everyone will get all that they want but that was never going to happen anyway. If all sides are willing to compromise, then perhaps the deal that we can get won’t be a total disaster. Maybe Theresa May won’t go down as the worst Prime Minister ever.

Election Photo Oppertunities: The Best and The Worst


David Miliband really doesn’t like surprise birthdays


It is astonishing how important image can be for politicians. Photo ops are carefully crafted, with whole teams dedicated to ensuring that their candidate will not end up looking foolish. Its not hard to remember some of the more recent gaffs; Ed Milband eating a bacon sandwich, his brother David being terrified of ballons or Gordon Brown looking ridiculous wearing a helmet spring to mind. And while the most memorable photos from campaigns tend to be the leaders looking silly some can show the true nature of the candidate. Here is a look at the best and the worst.

Nicola goes bowling


Dope new album dropping soon

Nicola Sturgeon went bowling last week and it provided a number excellent photos. However, this was by far my favourite. Here it looks like she’s trying to appeal to both young and old by combining a sport in which participants tend to be older, whilst also looking as though she’s about to release the sickest grime album of the year.  It’s the expression, the hands and the jacket that all combine so perfectly. Also, the fact that she genuinely looks as though she’s enjoying herself brings this one higher in the rankings. All she’s lacking a gold chain. A stroke of genius. 8/10


Tim gets chased by a dog


Tim prances through a field


This one is harder to judge. Tim Farron either looks like he is having the time of his life or he was traumatised by a dog at a young age and that’s the reason for the brown trousers. Either way, it makes him look human like he can experience emotions like happiness or fear. You know, like a normal person. Connecting with the electorate was probably one of the Lib Dems leaders problems but this picture definitely helps solve that problem. 6/10

Willie meets some floating voters


Can you spot the odd one out?


While on the subject of the Lib Dems here is a picture of their Scottish leader, Willie Rennie, with two alpacas. I’m not quite sure what the context is here or if this a good or a bad photo. With his eyes not looking at the camera, it looks like he’s spotted an even better looking alpaca in the distance meaning that he’s going to abandon these two, leaving them to fend for themselves. Or perhaps he looks like one of Cruella DeVille’s henchmen and he is leading them to the slaughter for her new coat. Who knows eh? 7/10

Jeremy plays ball


Arsene Wenger is keeping tabs on this excellent English prospect


Pardon the pun but Jeremy Corybn has scored an own goal with this one. A middle age man, no matter what his profession, should not be playing football, with a shirt and cream trousers on, in public. I can understand the awkwardness of this photo. He most likely had arrangements later and he can be showing up caked in mud. What baffles me, even more, is why he made the choice to go in goals? Surely he’s capable of playing the same flowing, passing game of his beloved Gunners. Instead, he shot himself in the foot. 3/10

Theresa tries to act normal


All she’s missing is a pint and she’d be the spitting image of Nigel Farage


Eating. Nobody looks good eating. So why when you know the nation’s media is watching you would you go on an eat in public. Its never going to end well. To be fair, at least she’s not been caught mid-bite and is eating something relatively normal. Although I can’t say I can imagine Theresa May eating chips t any other time than during an election.  5/10

Jeremy wins the heart of the nation


Whisper sweet nothings to me.


Oh Jezza, what a heart throb. Look at how intensely he’s smelling that rose. If only he could give it to the entire nation then, maybe, just maybe, we might all fall in love with him and not just his progressive policies. 9/10

Tim sells his used car


I wouldn’t buy a used car from him.


There is nothing in this picture that is good for Tim Fallons image. The handshake and the smile make it look like he’s just managed to get rid of a banger that won’t even make it to the end of the road. Or perhaps as he’s gone to shake this ladies hand he’s done a very audible fart which everyone is now laughing at. Either way, this is a masterclass in how not to look like the next leader of the country.

Theresa’s 9th of June

On the back of an election defeat which she should have won, Theresa May contemplates what went wrong.

It was the next day and she was still in shock. Twenty points ahead when she announced the election. How could she have lost such a resounding lead? Theresa knew where she had gone wrong but there was nothing that she could do about it now. Fox hunting, it had all started with fox hunting. She couldn’t help it if she loved the sight of one beast tearing another to shreds. I mean, it goes down better in the opinion polls than ripping poor children apart. And the public could never know about how she fantasised about that, just like they couldn’t know the pleasure that Dave gained from buggering that pig. She supposed that hadn’t been his final blow. But that had been where it started.


It was all the small things that built upon each other until the public’s opinion became insurmountable. Who would have thought that people, rich and poor, would not want their family homes taken while their bodies were still warm? Worse still was the u-turn and, worse yet, the fact the public had figured out that it wasn’t even a u-turn.  She would have to ensure that Rupert had calibrated his societal brain conversion rags properly next time. She knew that after that fiasco she hadn’t looked “strong and stable”, that she had started to lose control.


As she sipped on her brandy her hand began to shake. She was thinking about the man who stole it, her premiership, away from her. Jeremy. Holier than thou, Jeremy. He was everything she wasn’t. Principled, able to smile and, the trait she hated most, one of the people. Theresa couldn’t get his socialist ideals out of her head. Who would have thought that he would have made sure that his manifesto had been fully costed? Who would have thought that he would pledge not to snatch lunches from almost one million children, build more houses for the young and that the vast majority of people wouldn’t mind taxing her pals a bit more in order to fund the NHS. Never mind that he believes that the Human Rights Act was a good thing. Typical Communist.  Theresa still couldn’t believe it. He was supposed to be the one running the dysfunctional party, not her.


The party machine had thought it would try a new way to smear Jeremy. He had been in contact with members of the IRA around the time of the Good Friday Agreement. Their friends in the press had pressured him about this. But he was prepared. He pointed out the hypocrisy of the attacks on him for talking to members of the IRA while the government actively supplies the Saudi Arabian government with tanks, aircraft and weapons to fight illegal wars. No attempt was being made to try and discuss a peaceful settlement. Surely that must be worse than conversing with IRA affiliates he said? Theresa had tried explaining that we needed the money from the Saudi’s so that we could fund services like the NHS, without taxing her fox mauling pals more.


Panic overcame her like the landslide the day before. How was she going to explain the extra nine-hundred-million that had been added to the deficit? She had only been in power for a number of months, true, but she had been part of the government for the past seven years. She had wasted millions on trying to curb immigration, was all but useless when campaigning against Brexit. She was as guilty as Hunt and Boris. She would have to deflect, be strong, be stable.


Theresa had decided that she would remain the leader of the conservative party, the only remain that she had ever felt strongly about. She had only been the leader for a matter of months. Her species life span would be able to survive for a great number of year, meaning that she could slowly wear down the electorate, until such a time as Rupert could be relied on again. Until then, she decided, she would have to re-enter her tomb. And wait.